what happens when i can’t sleep (or List #11).

Tonight is the second night in a row I have been unable to fall asleep. Neither yawn nor eye-rub has passed my way. Not even a quiet whimper.

(While I type this, I periodically look over at my partner…who has been enjoying the benefits of REM sleep for over an hour now…and feel jealous. It’s all good, though: he just mumbled something about muffin pans and chocolate pudding, so I’m sure to have a good laugh in the morning when I tease him about it and he can’t remember a thing).

To be honest, sleeplessness happens to me a lot…well, sometimes. I am somewhat of a night crawler, preferring late nights to early mornings, and mornings and I have had a dysfunctional relationship from the beginning. On most nights I can usually fake it, but not tonight. And not last night, either. I blame the ginko biloba I started taking on Friday.  I thought it would help me stay focused and have less-cranky mornings.  Now, while staying up all night in college almost always guaranteed I would be wide awake when morning happened, after 30 that little trick stopped working so well (in fact, staying up all night in my 30′s has proven to almost always guarantee extreme crankiness and the very real possibility of missing mornings all together).  Oh, the irony.

So, since I can’t sleep, I will plot adventures, instead.

1. Feeding the Wanderlust. I have been feeling anxious to wander. This time around, however, my mind is stuck on Ireland. I just want to go. Now.  Pubs, rolling hills, country towns and the Irish brogue are calling my name. All I can think about is not if, but when and how. (Disclaimer: the last time I felt a similar urge to travel I ended up spending 2 weeks holed up in a tiny bungalow along a fisherman’s beach in the Thai province of Chiang Mai… it was a glorious trip but my initial aim was for Brazil.)
2. Spelunking. Now that the weather has warmed up, I’m planning on hitting a few caves this summer.  I’ve spent a couple hours compiling a spreadsheet of all the national monuments (yes, I bought one of the NM passport books…), categorized by monument type. The Lava Beds in CA and the Oregon Caves look like lots of fun, and getting greater exposure to the west coast is a bonus.  Other caving adventures are being planned…
3. Books…yeah.  The cycle is never ending with this one, I’m afraid.  At the top of my book list this month is The Salmon of Doubt by Doug Adams.  I bought it in 2002 very shortly after it was released but never got around to reading it.  Guns, Germs and Steel is up next after that, possibly The Dresden Files series after that.
4. Movies. I’m planning to check out a few of the outdoor cinema shows this summer.  It combines a couple of my favorite things, evening picnics and films, and I think it’s a great summer tradition to be a part of since it happens all around the world.  Between Denver and Boulder, I will have several chances to see Goonies on the big screen again, as well a few other “oldie but goodies”…that is, if the rain lets up this month sometime.  If not, I’m also looking forward to seeing  The Last Airbender and Predators in the theaters.

Okay.  Seeing how it is going on 2 o’clock in the morning, I believe I am now officially obligated to lie in bed with the lights off and my eyes closed.  I do have to be at work later this morning, after all.  G’night!

Thirsty

I have been daydreaming about diving into the ocean all day, and with good reason: I have seen some of the most beautiful scenery there…

Malibu Beach in California, 2003

And the unforgettable…

Near Lima, Peru, 2005

…Until the next time we meet!

Current.

I’ve just returned from visiting with friends this weekend. It was great; it had been way too long since I last saw them. Now comes the unpacking part. I think in the last 2 weeks I’ve actually filled all the pieces in my luggage set.

My brother moved to Brooklyn yesterday. He’s interning at Mishka NYC this summer, working on some of their advertising campaigns. Boy, the kids do grow up fast.

Now that I’ll be home for a bit, I need to catch up on what’s been going on in the world. There are news feeds to read, emails to write, and I’m really eager to start editing a big bunch of photos and video clips I shot this weekend. I also haven’t picked up the cello in ages and have been feeling a wee-bit cranky over it. On the down-side, I had a bit of a run in with persons of the undesirable sort this weekend, too, but maybe I’ll save that for another rant. I’ve got better things to do.

Soothing Habits

The bridal shower last weekend went really well. Until the guests began to arrive, I hadn’t realized how nervous I was that the whole thing would be a flop. But (thank God) everything was well-planned and went off with only a couple of last-minute hitches. As always, I enjoyed being in the company of awesome women, especially since there was a reason to celebrate with a bit of frivolity! I miss being near to my closest girl friends (and I can’t wait to see you in July, Anne).

I’m back in Colorado, taking a refreshing breather, and I’m loving the cool, wet weather we’re having right now (read as No Lotion Needed . I head away again for the coming weekend to visit friends who are preparing for their first baby in September, to give the new mom some help around the house with her Spring cleaning.

Traveling has always brought clarity to my mind and a sense of well-being to my heart. Maybe it’s what I do when I’m on the move – letting go of my commitments, changing my perspective – or what happens when I arrive in another place – re-inventing myself, experiencing something new, getting back into the habit of what’s old and good – that changes me for the better.

Growing up, I was raised between the hustle and grime of Western New York and the slow, steady heat that can only be found south of the Mason-Dixon. I attended school in NY, then spent my summers and holidays with family in the suburbs of Georgia and the country-sides of South Carolina and southern Arkansas. As a kid, this dichotomy presented itself in one of two ways: when playing with children up North, I was the eccentric, “countrified” tomboy who wasn’t afraid of mud and bugs and who talked funny; down South, I was the loud, “bougie” cousin who, when introduced to company, was quickly identified as visiting from NY…and who talked funny Somehow, I have managed to melt the two worlds into a culture of “urban simplicity”, as my sister calls it, but that’s because I can’t seem to let go of either reality. I love them both. All grown up now (on most days), I certainly have a quick pulse and a strong taste for “big city” things; but, on some days, I’m still that little girl who jumped in puddles, scraped up her knees and loved falling asleep to the gentle rock of a row boat on a hot day. I much prefer dipping my feet in the lake, cooking a big Sunday dinner or wandering off at night to see the stars to, say, heading out for a fancy night on the town. It has always been this way and I don’t think it will change.

Last week, as I enjoyed the southern comfort and company of friends who’ve become part of my family, I remembered these things. I relaxed into a deeper sense of me, and it felt good to be home. This is the kind of summer I wanted.

Books and Backpacks

I’m on my way to the east coast tomorrow afternoon, to attend the bridal shower I’ve been planning. I’m trying to pack, something I really dislike doing (second only to unpacking). I’d rather be snug in my bed listening to the wind storm blow around outside as I fall asleep.

I just picked up a really good book. It’s “The Time Traveler’s Wife” by Audrey Niffenegger. I’ve had the book on my shelf for ages, but am just now getting around to reading it. A good friend of mine loves this book, and now I see why (it’s her copy I’ve got now, actually). The plot development is unusual, but it works so well for the protagonists and their story. They relate to my younger self, my present self and, quite possibly, the woman I will be many years from now. There are life lessons, many of them subtle yet poignant – this is the most tender and intriguing story I’ve read in years. Oh, and of course, there’s time travel!

Okay, enough procrastination. Time to get down to business with the suitcase. Have a nice weekend

Random Stuff

The semester is coming to a close, and I’m thinking of plans for the summer. I haven’t been to visit some members of my extended family in a long time, so taking my triennial swing through Georgia this year will also most likely include Arkansas and Louisiana. Taste of Buffalo, Shakespeare in the Park, Allentown Art Festival, and the summer regattas down by the Marina are also calling out to me from deep within Buffalo’s West Side. There are several friends there I haven’t connected with in a while, and many of them have since gotten married and had children. It would be nice to see them again.

Come June, here in Colorado, I’ll be looking to move again. I knew this was a temporary living situation when I moved here (my housemate is getting married in July and moving in with her fiancé), but seven months has gone by very quickly! I’m looking for a change, and for a while I’ve considered connecting with a new community. I’m eager to move forward with some of the social policy work I’ve gotten into, as I feel strongly that our country is in need of “techies” who have a deeper understanding of social consequences. While I look forward to the prospect of being an engineer upon graduation (who at times puts on a scientist’s hat), I feel I would be just as content giving policy advice to other engineers and scientists lest we continue to build systems that omit the human factor. I’m hoping to carve a deeper niche for myself within that community. Here’s to hoping and succeeding.

When too much is just enough…

I posted this photo on my Flickr page several days ago, after spending another of several weekends away from home in the last couple of months.

Despite the minor frustrations frequent travel can create, I’ve always found the change of environment refreshing. Quite simply, the more of it I get the better I just “feel”. I’d even go as far as saying that not traveling enough leads to feelings of restlessness.

It’s been a number of months, six or more, since I’ve allowed my schedule to take me away from home for extended amounts of time. Getting back into the habit of regular travel felt good. And with Spring about to be upon us, there’ll be many opportunities for fun and sun.

2007

The new year has begun! December ended with several laughs, hugs and smiles, and I was in the company of dear friends. After the second storm that hit Colorado, travel back home from the east coast was fairly trouble-free, except that none of the shuttles were running from the airport out to where I live. That was problematic, to say the least, and had only a few very costly solutions.

Alas, I made it home and felt at peace when I saw my front door.

Happy New Year to everyone!

More Snow in Colorado?

The weirdness:

Inches of snow in Boulder, CO: lots

Inches of snow in Buffalo, NY: zero

I just received an email from the airline carrier I booked my return flight with, it says if the current storm continues through the weekend my flight will be re-booked! No! After waiting for a taxi for FOUR hours very late on Sunday night, finally giving up and hitching a ride part of the way out to DIA, and being re-booked THREE times after I got there so I couldn’t fly out until late on Monday, I just can’t make it through another airport fiasco.